In America, we have weird traditions like carving faces into pumpkins. It is something I have always done since a kid. I am not sure I know where it came from in history, but I am sure if I did know I would would be so interested in carving pumpkins anymore. Sarah and I spent a date night de-gutting, carving and lighting our pumpkins. We had fun.
Sarah and I traveled to the Congo this summer where we were involved in running youth training seminars and connecting with church and youth leaders to try and get them thinking about youth issues, Christian camping and developing youth ministry training. This is my first visit to the Congo (my wife grew up there) and we are trying to work out ways in which we can encourage training for youth leaders in a country where it doesn’t really exist.
The Congo is not unusual—in many countries in Africa the idea of a formalized or structured youth leaders training doesn’t exist. Most youth leaders just do what they have seen done by others and they follow the patterns and styles of what they know. What this means is that youth ministry in many countries is stuck and young people are drifting away from the church because youth ministry is irrelevant to them.
Some of the issues youth leaders are facing in the majority world (like Congo) are:
- People are not seen as important until they reach age 30
- Young people are not recognized as a separate culture
- Churches and Bible colleges do not have the material or people to teach and equip youth leaders and pastors
- Lack of material, equipment and resources for youth ministries
- Lack of support and recognition of the importance of youth ministry by pastors and church leaders
- Youth culture is functioning in the year 2000 while most churches are still functioning in a 1960’s model
- Youth leaders know that youth ministry in churches is not cutting it but they often lack the training, skills and freedom from church leaders to change the situation
- Youth leaders do not have people to mentor and train them in doing youth ministry and so they can easily get lost and discouraged in what they are trying to do.
Sarah and I are passionate about helping churches in Africa uncover the realities of youth ministry and to be able to connect into the spiritual and practical needs of young people so that the church of Jesus Christ may become so real and meaningful in their lives. I believe that this loss of meaningful youth ministry in churches in the majority world is starting to cause churches in these countries to lose their place and effectiveness in society.
There was such a large desire by many in the Congo who want to reach out to young people and to provide relevant youth ministry to young people inside and outside the church community. The thing that they lack is good training on understanding youth culture and leading youth ministry.
In the Congo there is no denomination or organization that provides consistent youth leadership training. Occasionally a group might run a seminar but there is nothing consistent where youth leaders can start to really grasp the basics of leading a youth ministry. The Congo is not alone in Africa—I am not aware of many countries in Africa where there is structured training in youth ministry. Many of the youth leaders we came in contact with around Congo are looking for ways in which they can even learn the basics of youth ministry. They can see the possibility of what could be, but for many of them this reality is far away because they do not have a way to learn and grow in developing and running effective youth ministry.
I came away from Congo even more committed to work out ways in which structured youth ministry training can be provided in countries where it doesn’t exist, countries from the majority world, countries where they do not have the same access to resources, countries where you do not have a place in society until you are thirty years old. I am also more fired up to continue leading our youth here in the USA to become better disciples of Jesus Christ.
The shrew on the loose finally got the noose.
It has been raging battling the past month or more with a shrew on the loose in our house. I plugged every hole I could find with steel wool and set a half-dozen traps in key positions around the house. Nothing. Only 2 escaped traps and a shrew that comes out of hiding any time it pleases, staring us in the face and laughing.
This shrew really tested my patience. This time of year I am use to shrews coming in the house, but have found them easy to trap. However, this guy was a Houdini.
Sarah had a great plan, “How about praying that we catch it?” I wish I would have though of that myself. It wasn’t more than a few hours later that at quarter past three in the morning we caught him. He was under our bed. I quickly got up and disposed of him in the most humanitarian way I could after weeks of annoying varmint-teasing.
I have learned a lot about shrew these past few years. They do eat all the bugs in your house. They cannot climb like mice because they are diggers. The have beady eyes, but a keen sense of smell and hearing. Some people make them pets. For me, as long as they stay outside they are just fine.
Yesterday, I found $20,000.00 in Costa Rica Colones [about $40 in US cash] in my pocket. I laughed out loud. Not only is it useless in the US, but I could have used it 4 months ago while Sarah and I were on our honeymoon. You see, when Sarah and I were leaving Costa Rica we were unaware that they had a departure tax. We spent most of our spending cash before getting to the airport so that we would not have to exchange it back to US dollars. The tax was about $40 US dollars. After looking through our bags for about an hour we found $34 and still needed more. The ATM’s would not take our cards and the departure flight was getting close to leaving. We praise the Lord for providing a stranger who gave us $6 to get the tax cleared. We were in such a pickle that Sarah was about to sell off her iPod for extra cash!
The truth is, money related issues in marriage can draw a husband and wife closer together. Can you be serious, money brings about intimacy in marriage? Yes. Stats say that money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce. I believe financial tension in relationships can be improved if they follow through with a few communicative principles:
Pray for wisdom. Not many couples invite God into their financial lives. God wants to be involved with the money in marriage. Marriage is always a joint relationship between husband, wife, and God. Pray that God to guide you in how he wants the funds earned, used, and distributed. Release control of your money and give God control (James1:5).
Be Partners. Marriage is is no longer two “me’s” but not a “we.” (Genesis 2:24) In the one-ship of marriage couples lose their individual identity. This includes finances both what comes in and goes out of the home. From now on we are in this financial situation together and we have an equal responsibility and an equal opportunity.
Set clear goals. Not clear as mud, but crystal clear. Setting goals is not just about finances, but it is about all things in life. It is having a plan for life. In other words, it is having a vision for the future. Where do you want to be? What do you want to be doing? Goal setting is where a husband and wife look at each other and say, “Where do we want to be in 5 years? In 10 years? In 15 years?” Finances fit into this plan (Proverbs 15:22).
Unity. One flesh equals one bank account. It doesn’t matter who earns it. Some couples think that the one who earns the money spends the money or dictates how it ought to be spent, rather respect your unique contributions to the home. As the husband I bring in the majority of the paycheck, but my wife, she runs the home. What’s mine is hers and what is hers is mine (1 Corinthians 7:4). We do have separate savings accounts, which we use to purchase gifts for each other on occasions. Give up the insignificant things of life so that you can gain the greater reward of a unified marriage (Philippians 2:4).
Divide and Conquer. Money management takes time, energy, knowledge, and wisdom. One of the common complaints about the money in marriage is the burden of so many responsibilities and commitments. Couples are forced to decide who will take care of the different tasks related to personal finances. Some things that might work are making a listtogether of all the jobs related to personal finances [i.e. balancing the check book, paying bills, retirement options, investment, etc.] and choose together the jobs you would enjoy doing, then get to work.
Set a budget and stick to it. A budget represents the small goals you meet along the way to achieving your ultimate goals. Once the budget is set it is important that you track your progress. The best way is to meet together regularly [once a month or every 3 months] to communicate how it is working. Either spouse can call or schedule a family pow-wow. Our goal is on a Monday once a month to sit for a few minutes to walk through our budget plan. The meeting shouldn’t take any more than 15–20 min per week.
Give to God first. The budget must start with what you will give to God and His work. We will give a predetermined percentage of our income to our local church and others in need (Proverbs 16:3). He provides all that we have and need, therefore, we must give back as an expression of our devotion and thanks to Him. Just like my story earlier, God provided for our needs in Costa Rica. It was only a few bucks. Now I have a reminder of His provisions through some colones. I know just who to give these too!!
Ah, the joys of translation.
I was seeking to illustrate to a group of youth leaders in the Congo how confrontation is not always a fun or enjoyable thing to do, but it is necessary. I asked the question, “Does it bring you joy to discipline your children?” [having the teaching point of Heb.12:3-11 in mind]. They looked at me with a blank stare. One man nodded his head up and down, signifying a “Yes.” with a don’t you expression on his face. To that I responded, “To beat them?” They nodded.
In that moment I had realized that my illustration had failed. Needless to say I had to work another illustration that fit in the culture. Now I am not going to make a case for spanking or beating your children, grounding or giving timeouts. What I will say is that those in the Congo with children were well behaved.
pray for Leonard
and his family
While in the Congo I met a pastor, Leonard. He has been in Bukavu for 6 months waiting for work and a means to get back to his wife and children who where many kilometers away. He made a special visit to see Sarah and me. In the conversation, which Sarah translated, he asked if we could take his three sons. With big eyes his sons were sitting quiet, listening. Sarah, translated the message to me with the addition of, “Be careful how you nod.”
The Congo is a different kind of place. You see, Leonard thought he can not provide for his children and in desperation they will be better off with these Americans he barely knows. How would you respond? Our response was simple. No. We explained to him that it would be impossible to take his children. What Leonard’s children need to see their father’s struggle of faith and these difficult times will be fruitful to his family. I promise Leonard my prayers and ask that you would pray too.
Pray that his children would see their fathers faithfulness.
Pray for work and the provisions of God.
Pray that he would trust God to provide all of his needs.
Pray that God would be made famous through his example.
For months Sarah and I have been pondering the mysterious appearance of a single white chair strategically placed in the isle of church during our wedding. We do not know how it got there or who put it there. At first it bothered us, but now it has become a picture of something sweetly divine.
The empty chair has reminded us of our most important guest of honor at our wedding: Christ. We desired to make Christ the focal point of our wedding and it couldn’t be more fitting to have him in the center of the room sitting within the white chair. I won’t go to much further with this analogy for the sake of heresy, but I know for certain Christ is with us and will continue to be the centerpiece and highest seat within our marriage. Thanks to whoever put the chair in the isle. It has been a source of great frustration turned to joy!!
We are back! Wow, what a journey!! I am sad that it is over, but looking forward to taking the lessons learned and applying them back home. The trip has put a greater fire within my inward parts to head back to the land of great need. Here are some of the lessons I have learned while in the Congo:
People everywhere have needs. The people of the Congo have needs and so do those in the USA, Canada, and uttermost parts of the world. The job is daunting and daring. In reality, it is a job no man can do alone, but only a force of people motivated by compassion for the needy, impoverish, and broken.
I can only do so much alone. We were able to meet over a hundred different people while in the Congo. Mostly pastors, youth leaders and youth. They have many questions and various needs. I can only give so much. I can count on my hands and toes the numbers of individuals who approached us for food, clothing and money. I make more in a day than they do in a year, yet I was unable to fulfill the needs of everyone. Am I required to. No. However, as the old proverb states, “to whom much is given much is required.”
Need is a strong word. A need is something I cannot live without (ie. food, water, and shelter). We think we need lots of things. When truthfully we want a lot and need little. It is hard to be convinced you need little. It is equally as hard to convince other who have little that you (who have much) cannot fulfill their needs.
God is the only one able to fill the void. I cannot throw money or resources at physical or spiritual poverty. If I do I will spoil rotten a growing baby (for more on this click here). Only God change change a life. I can make ones life better for a time, but God can make it better for eternity.
I need more of God. I think of Jesus countless encounters with wealthy and poor, needy and satisfied throughout the Scriptures. His motto to all peoples is, “I must increase and you must decrease,” “follow Me,” “bear your cross,” and “in your weakness I will be made strong.” In other words may there me less of me and more of God. The greatest need I have is not more spiritual books, money for a new roof or garments to keep me warm, but a wholly relationship with my Creator and Sustainer. I need the Great Provider, God.
August 16 lost in translation. Sarah and I traveled to two churches this morning. At the first church we just observed and sang. Can I say it again? The singing here is amazing. At the second church I preached. The gentleman that translated for me was a rookie. I suppose we had something in common!? Overall the sermon was communicated without too many verbiage distractions. Interesting I was speaking on commitment. There is no word in the Swahili that can be translated “commitment.” The closest is “standing firm.”
Most people in the Congo can speak 4-5 languages: Swahili, French, tribal languages, and maybe English. I am such a monolingual American. I took 4 years of French in high school. I wish I could remember some of that!? Sarah speaks great Swahili, which is great. Some of Swahili the phrases I have picked up (it is all phonetic so that helps):
Jambo = hello
Habari = how are you?
Bwana Asifiwe = praise the Lord (what else do you need to know?)
Ndyo = yes
Hapana = no
Mungu = God
Muzungu = white guy (I hear this a lot walking in the streets)
kivukutu = hot
asanti = thank you
tokainje = get out of here (mostly for fun during games with the youth)
FYI-We just heard that Kenya Airlines was on strike this week, but praise the Lord they are back to work! We will be boarding a small bus at the Congo/Rwanda boarder Tuesday morning to head to the
August 17 free day. Sarah and I are now finished with all our projects. We headed out for a few meetings with pastors and friends. The rest of the day we saw sights and went to the market. I relaxed. Tomorrow we head to the boarder to catch a bus for a 5 hour ride through the winding Rwandan hillside. Wednesday morning we fly out of Rwanda to Kenya to Amsterdam to NYC to Buffalo where Sarah’s family will pick us up for her brother’s wedding over the weekend. Bon Voyage Congo!!
August 14-15 A Congo Camp. For two days we are holding a half-day retreat for youth. We have about 20 youth and 20 adult leaders that are attending. This gives the leaders attending our seminars a practical application to what they are learning. Each of the adult leaders has a responsibility: teaching, leading worship, prayer, administrating, cooking, serving, scheduling, leading activities and more. The leaders did an amazing job and took ownership of their responsibilities. On a side note they all love the game HUWA. It is all they want to play!!
We met with a group of the leaders from the seminar that now have a vision to start a camp that travels across the country to churches that could use a camp/retreat as a means to reaching out or growing their youth. It is great to see their passion for God and youth. We walked through the process of beginning such an organization (theological structure, government legalization, and more). My experiences with the ReFUEL Retreats, Shakamak Bible Camp and Checkpoint Bible Camp have proved to be valuable.
